about college. and fitting in...

i was just thinking about college lately, and how my experience so far is pretty much nothing that i ever expected college to be like. MAYBE it's because i go to an art school, but i am not sure. the people, the dorm life, and the over atmosphere of my school feel somewhat "non-traditional" to me. i think it's because when i visit normal colleges, like when i used to visit my sister at Babson and when i visited UMass with Jon and his mom, they felt so awesome, like what college SHOULD feel like to me. it's so odd.

my college, geez i'm just so sick of it in a sense. college pretty much killed my love for drama. i still want to act this year, but the people just kill it for me. if you're gonna sit around for an hour long rehearsal cracking sexual jokes, okay, i don't want to be a part of it..i have artwork to do. if it's gonna be like that this year i just may officially call it quits from acting for fun. drama people can be either wicked fun or really cocky. luckily for me in high school i had a really great time with the people i got to act with. i think it's more like a minority thing in college. the older students are obviously the ones who run the whole deal. maybe this year will be different...?

another thing i dislike about college, it's just the entire experience....i will probably leave college with little to absolutely no baggage. the only people i have really met and become friends with were the people i lived with and their friends, as well as other art kids with similar personalities to mine. i never bothered hanging out with people from my normal university classes. people from my art school classes, yes, but otherwise, it's just too awkward for me. i am not like other people in the art school. i do not party hard or take massive amounts of drugs. i will never belong or fit into a clique in college. i am there to just work and get my degree and get out of there. for me, it isn't 100% entirely about making friends. yes, i absolutely adore the girls i am living with next year, but they will probably be some of the only TRUE friends i leave college with. college just isn't really my "thing." i'm just so fed up trying my best to be nice to everyone in the art school and half the people are these arrogant indie-holes who want nothing to do with you anyway.

i hate for this to sound like the typical whiny note like "ahhh i just don't fit in," but for me, "fitting in" has always been pretty difficult since i have so many different sides to my personality.

there are many different allie's: the allie who wants to go out in her skinny jeans, heels and a black blazer and french braid for cocktails / the allie who is a hippie and wants to wear a cozy dress and run in a field barefoot / the allie who wants to dress up and go to renaissance faires because she is a history nerd / the allie who wants to go to a show and get pushed around in a mosh pit and kicked in the face /the allie who will wear her best dress to class just because she feels like it.

yesterday was quite a day, let me tell you.

hey all,

so yesterday was a pretty good and bad and wonderful day.

first off, i had been looking around for jobs in Hartford for the fall, especially creative ones. i'd rather have a creative job that isn't 100% permanent than an internship (for now at least). i finally stumbled upon an opportunity at the Hartford Children's Theatre right on Farmington Ave. in Hartford (across from the Mark Twain house....pretty snazzy). i shot him over an email and the next thing i knew he wanted me to come in for an interview yesterday. the house that facilitates their offices is a beautiful victorian house. the man who interviewed me, Ryan, said the house was built by a woman who at the time was around to be Mark Twain's neighbor, and they disliked each other haha. Basically this woman invaded the block by building this massive church next door, and another house next to her as well. apparently it aggrivated Mark Twain because the "view" was not very nice any more. oh i'll stop...i'm such a history nerd.

anywho, i was so excited that Ryan was so excited to tell me about the program. he dove right in and told me all about the program, and how he just stepped in last year during their production of Beauty and the Beast. he has toured with GREASE on broadway! SO cool! he was really chill, too. he wore a khaki jacket and jeans for crying out loud....so awesome. i felt really relaxed and comfortable. i remember at my Eric Carle interview i felt like i was on pins and needles because i was not sure if they liked me, or even my work for that matter. when i pulled out my art, for example, the piece of Jon and his large feet, Ryan was like "oh, yep...saw this one already and loved it...it has an awesome perspective."

i was so shocked that he had actually taken the time to LOOK at my website! he really liked to look at my work, which felt awesome. the three shows that are taking place this coming season are Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, Annie, and 13. there are two smaller touring shows in between, which include Schoolhouse Rock and a play based off an author's children's book. he said he wants to use me for at least a couple! he already had an artist in mind for a while for Willy Wonka, which is fine, but he said he may need to use more than one artist on the larger set pieces. sweeeeet.

so i'm all happy on my way home, it's a beautiful day. then i pull out of the parking lot and head through the outskirts of harford. i'm crossing this bridge heading towards Albany Ave. and all of a sudden, my car starts stalling. i put my foot on the gas and it would rev and then jerk forward a tad each time. i started shaking and my heart started to pound...i was really, really scared. i felt really bad for the guy driving behind me. i would pray he gave us enough room in between in case my car started to roll backwards. turning left onto Albany Ave. was brutal. i was literally stopping in the middle of the street. i was so afraid my car was gonna break down in the middle of Albany Ave.....luckily, i was super close to the Handel Performing Arts Center (which is an off-campus building for the Hartt School) so i pulled into their side parking lot. WHAT a big sigh of relief. i called my mom and told her what happened. she came right away and we called for a tow truck and all. my interview ended at 2:15 and i didn't leave that parking lot until 5:30-5:45 hahaha. my car had a leak in one of its transmission pipes. eek. that car needs to be fixed like, every two weeks, i swear.....

we dropped it off at the shop in Indian Orchard and then me and my mom got Red Robin for dinner. then we went to Wal-Mart in Ware cause we needed to get a few things for our cruise next week! i got an awesome recycled bag made from unused Capri-Sun pouches...soo cool.

well, that was my super eventful day :o)